To Those Who Have Never Been on the Outside Looking In

Diversity comes in many shapes and sizes and oftentimes what you see in
a person is not always what you get. It was not just about the color of
a person's skin or ethnic background, but it also about acceptance of
differences that go beyond the surface of ones skin color. 

During my sophomore year of high school I decided to go to a private
school ten minutes from where I lived. Throughout my first year I was
welcomed with open arms as everyone crowded me in flurry excitement. I
was the new girl and in a school of 350 students I was a treat. People
seemed nice and caring with no intentions of being confrontational like
many students at my old school. I was going through a culture shock of
sorts and I was blind to what was really happening by a black veil.  It
was't until my junior year that the veil finally lifted. For the first
time I could see everyone clearly. It was as if the summer away from my
friends cleared my mind. I went back to drama, teachers pets and
two-faced lying students.  I was guilty of stereotyping.  Because I was
attending a mennonite school, my expectation was that the students would
be different and I expected them to kind, caring and honest.  In reality
-- they were no different than the rest of us. 

For the first time I realized that in order to fit in you had to play a
game and you had to play it well. The rules were simple: gain
information of those around you and use it. Do what you have to do to
stay on top including lie and cheat. It was like a jungle and it was a
game I had no intention of playing. Because of this I was an outcast and
people who I thought were my friends turned their backs on me. This was
all because I didn't share their beliefs. I wasn't mennonite, I didn't
possess all the ins and outs of the inner circle that were partially
required to survive.  In their eyes, I wasn't normal. In a school so
small everyone knew everyone else's business and problems. The students
of the school were all related.  I was way too trusting and learned the
hard way that confiding in one person was like a death sentence in their
social heirarchy.  

I have to admit that my peers did do a good job of saving face and
pretending like they cared. In my opinion, it was common practice for
the students to make fun of anyone or anything that was different from
their own ideas.  The irony is that mennonites are taught to love, care,
and respect one another no matter the diffferences that seperates us and
they used the term "community" to describe their school. I was so
disgusted from hearing it so much that I thought I would scream and
voice my opinion on the matter. This place wasn't a community it was
hell. 

But my experience attending the school  wasn't all bad. In fact, I
learned something very important during my two years of torture...no one
is perfect and everyone is different. I learned to accept people for who
and what they are disabilities and all. People can relate and understand
someone if they have a visible problem like a broken bone. Instead of
being scared they are understanding and sympathetic.

You're left labeled and friendless with no one who really understands.
You're forced to walk around with a weight that drags you down because
no one is willing to help you carry that weight except for family.
People are scared of what they can't see becasue they don't understand
it. 

Everyone should be aware that words cut deeper than a knife. 


Thank you.